November is National Adoption Month and I'd like to share our adoption story. Ours is like many stories in that it was a leap of faith that spurred us to follow something much bigger than our own plans.
Our first pregnancy with Princess was textbook perfect so we anticipated our second child would follow right behind right upon trying. But after five years of struggling for a second child we ended up in a place of frustration and hopelessness. Months of anticipation were met with disappointment and two heartbreaking miscarriages. For those of you who know me, you know life was not going according to "my plan". Nothing was wrong - the doctors said. Just relax - family repeated. It will happen - was friend's great advice. But when you are in those shoes and your heart's deepest desire doesn't come, five years seems like fifteen and well meant words don't help ease heartache.
Our adoption journey kicked off in 2006 when we attended a
Soon after while I was praying in bed one night about these adoption conversations I was asking God what we should do. I was confused and excited and scared, but mostly confused. While praying I literally heard the word "James" whisper in my head. I ignored it thinking my brain was leading me to baby names after all this adoption talk. I tried to sleep but heard it again and again. Now many of you may be thinking exactly what I was thinking - CUCKOO! This lady is nuts and should just go to sleep. But nothing like this had ever happened to me before so I was really struck by it. I heard it again so I got up, grabbed my Bible and headed to the bathroom for some quiet. I figured reading would help calm my mind and the tricks it was playing on me. But what to read? I could not get "James" out of my head and went ahead and opened my Bible there. Now I am not a Bible scholar in any way and did not know what James entailed. I started reading Chapter 1 and it talked about trials, temptation, listening and doing. And then it hit me - the last verse of James 1. Verse 27; "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress..." My heart was racing, "Orphans? Orphans? Are you serious?" Of all the verses in the Bible, this is the one I turn to tonight when seeking an answer about adoption? It seemed very clear to me the answer had just been given. I was crying and my body was shaking. I went to my sleeping husband and woke him, "You won't believe this - but we are supposed to adopt."
The next days we spent researching and talking to adoptive resources. In the end we decided to adopt locally and become licensed foster-parents. This would allow us to not only help children in need, but also families (orphans and widows) and could lead to an affordable adoption for us. So we entered the world of adoption beginning with mounds of paper work, references, home-studies, personal questions and background checks all while taking licensing courses. It was one of scariest thing we'd ever done! It was definitely not in our "plan". But that was how we knew it was right and what kept us going when it got hard. To us if it had been an easy or a flippant decision, that would have been our red flag to take a step back and re-evaluate.
Following our licensing and approval processes "Tee" was placed in our home. He was with us for a year before his adoption was finalized. Six months into his placement we also discovered we were pregnant. So seven years later we're right where we always hoped we'd be. We just didn't get there by taking the road we had "planned". But this other road definitely led us to things greater than we ever imagined and to children far greater than we ever expected!
** To everyone struggling or desiring to have children, I pray for you all the time and urge you to consider adoption and it's many options. God put that desire in your heart for a reason. **
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